The Oregonian says bedbugs are here. Which all you loyal Mercury readers already knew. Plus y'all got to look at a pretty (and apparently pretty controversial) lady while getting in your Cimex lectularius education.
Ooooh, Portland has a firebug, too! TriMet and fire investigators want you to look at this fellow's picture in case you ever see him while you're, you know, riding public transit or shopping for beer at Freddies or eating vegan biscuits with pasty gravy at a twee-'n'-d darlin' brunch joint.
Mayor Sam Adams attended yesterday's Gang Violence Task Force meeting, the Tribune reports. The mayor gave a presentation on his gun-law reforms while police said this was one of the most violent years in recent memory.
Only the publicly funded war in Iraq has ended. Private armies continue to thrive. To wit: The Company Formerly Known as Blackwater created nearly three-dozen shell companies to obtain government contracts after it "came under intense scrutiny for reckless conduct." What kind of "reckless conduct?" Oh, nothing much. Only the hapless slaughter of Iraqi civilians.
Craigslist tells prostitutes, masseuses, and professional dinner dates where they can get off. The word "CENSORED" has replaced the link to the site's adult services section.
About those beheadings in the desert... I kinda made that shit up. Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer follows up her embarrassing debate freeze-up by acknowledging she "misspoke" when defending her reactionary anti-immigration law.
On second thought, Hurricane Earl has decided to spend the weekend in Maritime Canada, having developed a sudden taste for Molson, potato farms and Yogi Bear-like French-Canadian accents.
A "school headmaster" after a 7.1 earthquake, New Zealand's most significant in 80 or so years: "Our china cabinet has crashed, pictures are off the wall, anything high up has come down and the cat has gone. He is probably still heading south." Sucks about the china, but, hey, now you can get a dog!
"Popcorn lung." A court awarded a factory worker in Chicago's western suburbs more than $30 million, saying years of working around the chemical used to make microwave popcorn taste like butter left him with a condition known as bronchiolitis obliterans.
Even in a recession, when fast food's supposed to kick ass economically, Burger King is a disaster. Disclosure: I not-so-secretly prefer its flame-broiled "meat" over McDonald's fried crack-patties and tallow fries.
Now watch this heavyset fellow tell the haters and the players, all the Arch-loving naysayers, to back the fuck off: