That's what I'm getting from this I, Anonymous submission. It does sounds like, at least, that the historic monument has found a loving home with someone who appreciates its long and debaucherous history, and you know, was there, man:
I was here during the rise and the fall of the club Satyricon. I saw bullshit bands get fame while talent was passed by. I watched as local papers told us Courtney Love was a regular (she definitely was NOT!). And that if we were lucky we could get in to see Portland bands like Everclear and Sleeter-Kinney (NOT PORTLAND BANDS!). Who could I trust in this town? Who wouldn't lie to me? The goddamn marquee sign on the front of the building!! That's who! When it said "90 Proof" or "Sweaty Nipples" or "Poison Idea" or "Jolly Mon" or one of my all time favorite postings, "Speed Weenie w/Shit Finger," or "M99," "Flap Jacks," The Creeps," "Cryptic Slaughter," "Spaztic Blurr," "Big Daddy Meat Straw" I knew it was going to be an evening of pure PORTLAND debauchery. What? You don't know who these bands are? The sign on the front of the Satyricon does! That's why I drove downtown in my official looking truck, with an official ladder. Put on an official orange vest and an official hard hat, and in broad daylight officialy STOLE THE SIGN off the front of the building. It Is in my posession and will never be in the hands of the likes of Art Alexookiedooke (that Everclear guy) or Britney Spears or whoever the hell the local media wants to tell me rocked this town inside out!! Could you imagine Justin Beeber owning the awning from out front of C.B.G.B.? Not in my lifetime!! NOT IN MY TOWN!!
It's BIEBER, dude.
