Live from the Rose Garden as the Portland Trail Blazers welcome the New Orleans Hornets in a spirited game of five-on-five basketball. Earlier this week Joel Przybilla declared he was 90% certain he'd return from his nearly-year long absence tonight, then a few days after making that announcement he was 100% certain he came down with a virus and ended up in the hospital. After surgically removing the flu from his knees—no Blazers play is allowed to suffer from a non-knee related ailment—Przybilla was "questionable." But word just came down that the Vanilla Gorilla will miss tonight with the stomach flu (of the knees).
In other news, some guy named Brandon Roy (sounds French to me) will return to action tonight.